It's funny; when you're sick in bed you become desperate to do all the things you didn't feel like doing when you were well.
I fell ill immediately after moving, so I was sick in bed with packed boxes surrounding me. When I felt a little better on Friday and actually got out of bed for awhile, I quickly became overwhelmed at how quickly May is flying by. I knew it'd be a busy month for me, but I hadn't accounted for two weeks in bed. The Basement Artists show is less than two weeks away, and I started to panic that I wouldn't be ready in time; that I couldn't even if I worked night and day.
However, in one day (yesterday) I managed to set up my office ("studio") and work on my thesis! All this, and I still had the time and energy to have dinner with a friend and go to a coworker's birthday party afterward. I was pretty impressed.
Today I slept in, and spent most of the afternoon at my parents house (mother's day, after all). When I got home, I got to work on the incomplete wallets I had started last December. Having been seperated from my sewing machine for four months, I was actually nervous to first turn it on. It's like hanging out with your childhood best friend after ten years... familiar yet somehow awkward. Once I got going though, both my hands and my heart immediately remembered what to do and why I was doing it.
I can't even describe how much I love to create. There's nothing like getting into a creative groove where every finished item is better than the last. As you feel your skills improving and refining, your aesthetic options widen and you can do more than you thought you had the skills to do. I worked for hours until I realized that I was incredibly thirsty and that my back hurt from hunching over my machine. I am no longer worried about having stock for the show.
Now, my only worry is what is known on etsy and craftster as "seller's anxiety"; is my stuff good enough to sell? Following this question is an equally stressful but more urgent one; how much to charge? The rule of thumb is to factor in the cost of your supplies and a decent hourly wage for yourself. Thing is, I spend HOURS on every piece. If a seam comes out even slightly crooked, I rip it out and do it over. Often times, I throw away something I've been working on for an hour or two because it has a tiny flaw that I can't accept. For reasons like these, I can't even afford to pay myself a measly $10 an hour; my products would be too expensive. But what can I do? I refuse to lower my standards of perfection. I guess I can only hope that I will eventually make less mistakes and pump through the more technical sewing parts faster and more efficiently.
I have a lot of work to do this week; I have an appointment with my photographer for this Saturday to shoot products for my portfolio and website. I hope to make exteriors for all the wallets tomorrow, and work on clothing Tuesday and Wednesday. Thursday... I have some ideas stewing. We'll see.
In other news; website updated with my snazzy new logo. Like it?